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The Jacket (Don’t get hooked!)

March 6, 2012

If you have the tendency to take on problems that aren’t yours and allow the problems of others to affect you deeply, you may be “getting hooked.” Getting hooked is what happens when you internalize someone else’s concerns, feelings, or bad attitude and it rubs off on you.  I liken this to someone handing you a jacket to wear that doesn’t belong to you but you put it on anyway in an effort to be caring and polite.  The jacket is not your style at all and it’s hot and uncomfortable and it stinks really badly but you wear it nonetheless because you feel you are obligated to do so, but you’re not. 

You have a choice, and you have the power to take off the jacket and give it back to the person who gave it to you.  You don’t have to be mean or callous about it, just give it back and wish the best for them.  This can be very difficult if you are in the habit of taking on other peoples’ drama but if you continue to practice, you can become very good at it.  This does not mean that you don’t care or that you’re indifferent, it just means that you acknowledge that you are responsible for yourself and others are responsible for themselves. 

It is ok to stay separate from others and still love them.  Having a sense of self means you acknowledge that you have your own opinions and feelings and so do others, but that you are separate and autonomous from them.  At the same time, you will find with practice, not getting hooked will contribute greatly to your own well-being and positivity.  When you take back your power and you choose to not let others define your happiness, you will be amazed at how free and empowered you feel!…..Optimists Rock!



facebook:  The Optimists Edge

Copyright 2012   Robin O’Grady

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